Sunday Snippet

 

Hi all. Today's snippet is from my novel, Yield.  If you like your stories dark and gritty, this is for you. Although Yield is book 5 in the series, it can be read as a stand-alone. 

Blurb

A promising encounter takes a dark turn.

Captain Sami Soros and Father Jay Blackstone cross paths at a major European hub. When systems shut down due to a cyber-attack, flights are delayed and the resulting chaos is unprecedented.

After having served three tours in Afghanistan, recently discharged Sami struggles with his new civilian status. Emotionally depleted, and dangerously edgy, he views most of his fellowmen with utter contempt.

Jay is returning to his parish in San Francisco after a month-long retreat meant to shore up a crumbling vocation. All vestiges of spirituality melt away when he sets eyes on Sami.

They begin a clandestine affair fueled by a shared addiction to extreme forms of BDSM. Their relationship goes off the rails, and Jay reaches out to Rino Duran, a former seminarian. With the help of Dr. Ethan Marshall, Rino’s full-time Dom, the established couple attempt to separate truth from lies to give Jay and Sami a shot at happiness.

Excerpt

Pain from multiple sources woke me from a sound sleep. I was sprawled naked on an unfamiliar bed, my morning wood pressing against smooth cotton sheets. Guilt forced me to a sitting position. I groped for the lamp on the nightstand and squinted against the harsh light. My pajamas were folded neatly on a ladder-back chair near the door. Memories of last night assailed me after I noticed the streaks of dried blood on my penis—the only part of my body Rino hadn’t doctored. What must he think of me now?

My legs felt wobbly when I stood to retrieve my clothes. A wave of dizziness threw me off balance, and I fell to my knees, tipping over ungracefully. I rolled and stared at the ceiling, the threadbare carpet against my flayed back another painful reminder of last night. As I waited for the vertigo to pass, my thoughts naturally drifted back to Sami.

Our Chicago interlude had opened more than a few doors. Sami had been gentle in the beginning, taking into account my lack of experience. But he didn’t know how many hours I’d logged onto porn sites or the near misses with Grindr whenever I was desperate for human contact. I would have been better off with an anonymous hookup—someone forgettable who wouldn’t steal my soul—but I’d always chickened out in the end, too scared to make the first move.

Now, three months later, sex intermingled with pain was my drug, and Sami the competent dealer. Self-harm was my ineffectual means of coping with this dangerous game I was playing. Admitting I enjoyed being hurt and humiliated put me in a far more deviant category than fallen priest. Sami might have been the instigator, but I was a willing participant.

Some days, I felt I was going mad or, even worse, morphing into my father, spinning scenarios to justify my actions. How could I tell Rino I was the one who’d resumed contact after Sami discovered I was a priest and wanted nothing to do with my spiritual crisis? I did my research and found him, climbing the steep hill to his house with dogged determination, hoping he’d overlook my collar and my lies. I’d pushed, cajoled, and tempted until he broke down and took me on the carpet in his living room. The stories I’d made up since then were extravagant musings of my fevered imagination. I often had trouble separating fact from fiction, my alter ego emerging with horrifying ease. I’d completely lost touch with the man of God I’d hoped to embrace.

You can purchase your copy at AMAZON or read for free on Kindle Unlimited.